First Time Father. Baby Care

Sex of Your Baby

Husbands Need To Defend Your Wife

If your are seeking ways to determine the sex of your baby, sorry to disappoint you, this isn't it.

It's about something more serious, it's about who's taking the rap for not getting an heir to your family name. Sounds ridiculous? Not really...

When I first decided to write an article on this issue, some friends told me that I will be taking a big risk, but it is something I feel must be said. You should hear the conversations behind your wife's back and you might even be guilty of doing so yourself. Surprised? Come on fathers, even grandpa and grandma can be guilty of that too.

tatements like, "She didn't give me a grandson", "She is not capable of bearing me a son" or "I told you she wouldn't be able to bear you a son". Sound familiar? It is worse when you or your wife start to believe it or accept this as fact.

Scientifically, there are two schools of thought as to who determines the sex of the baby:

  1. Men are responsible as we contribute the X-chromosomes and Y-chromosomes sperm which determines the baby's sex.
  2. Women are responsible because the women release the egg which is negatively or positively charged. It then attracts X-chromosomes (negatively charged) or Y-chromosomes (positively charged) sperms whichever that is of the opposite charge.

Whichever school of thought you believe in, it shouldn't be your primary concern. What's important isn't whether you have stronger male sperms or your wife contributed a negatively or positively charged egg. It isn’t something you or your spouse can control although there are claims that it is possible, there are no scientific proof that can confirm it.

The importance remains in the fact that your wife has to carry your child in her for the whole nine months of normal pregnancy with the exception of premature birth. It is certainly not an easy task, the physical changes and inconveniences she will be going through.

As husbands we share in our wife's joys and sorrows. As a wise saying goes "Husbands love your wife". However, this isn't the way for some husbands and our parents. Having a son means carrying on the family line. This could cause depression and unhappiness in your wife.

Parenthood brings with it many disputes in the way the child is cared for, disciplinary issues, hygiene, what the child will learn, skills to groom, just to name a few. Believe me, having a son or daughter is the least of your worries. If you and our parents do not get over this son or grandson issue, it could fuel future disputes. This is ammunition you are better off without.

This does not mean that fathers are spared the disgrace of not having a son; you probably would have heard statements like, "You are not man enough to give me a son" or "Daddy’s little soldiers are weak". But that’s for another article.

It is easy to say it does not matter if you do not have a son but the reality is it does. Love your wife, be it a baby girl or boy. Stand firm no matter who says or suggests otherwise. Neither you nor your wife can determine the outcome of your baby’s sex. As Christians would say, "It is the will of God". No one has the right to judge your wife or you. So husbands assure your wife and defend her. Oh yes, don’t blame yourself too.

« Back to Index Page